I Converted without Knowledge of My Family
Here is my story…?.
My husband and I met during our bachelor degree college and we were best friends. He always told me he loves me more than his life. I talked to my parents that I want to marry him. My parents maturely react to me. They make me understand many times that this relationship won’t work as he is Christian and don’t trust whatever he says.
My husband used to talk big things about the richness of his family and his parents although it was totally lie. He used to make stories and I always believe in him because when you are in love with someone you always believe him moreover you lose the ability to differentiate the trust because ‘love is blind’.?
We had lot of problem in getting married and my husband even told me once that he may get converted into Hinduism. He was ready to do anything for our marriage. My husband got US visa so he told me he will go to US only if I marry him so I converted into Christianity in Rs. 20 stamp paper and I married to him without informing my family and he went USA.
My elder sister did arrange marriage and marry in the same cast. She had problem in her marriage life. My parents told me that we are totally oppose to allow me to marry any Christian guy and my sister already had problem in her marriage life so if I will have problem in marriage life in future then they will be in lot of pain. Still I didn’t convinced by them.
My parents got to know that I got married, they didn’t said me anything instead when my husband came back from USA my parents had little function and I moved to my husband’s family.
Now my life changed from here…..
There are lot of bad experience happened to me every day but let me describe some of them.
Is playing Garba dance sin?
We had a dance party after our marriage function and at the end of the party my parents requested to me to tell DJ to play garba and I did but on the other hand my husband got angry that why they played garba and her mom stand up and walk as she hates garba. My husband is scared from her mom too much. HE LOVE ME MORE THAN HIS LIFE HOW COME HE DIDN’T TOLARENT GARBA FOR ME?
He took me every Sunday to church and we sat there almost two hours. Even I never went to temple and had puja for two hours but still for his love I did everything he said. Once on New Year I asked him to go temple and he refused. He is scared that if his mom knows then she feels bad. HE LOVE ME MORE THAN HIS LIFE HOW COME HE SAID NO TO JUST SPEND HIS 15 MINUTS IN TEMPLE?
Is eating Prasad sin?
We had Satya Narayan Katha at my mom home. My mother in law told me that don’t let his son to sit in pooja as it is sin in their culture. We just went to puja for few minutes and my husband even didn’t take prasad. I told him to eat it as normal food but he didn’t take it as having Prasad is sin in Christianity he said. Before marriage whenever he come to my home and I offer prasad, he always took it. HE LOVE ME MORE THAN HIS LIFE HOW COME HE DIDN’T EAT PRASAD THOUGHT ONE DAY HE TOLD ME TO GET CONVERT INTO HINDUISM?
There are lots of small things which I feel shy to write down. One year I lived with his family and almost each day I cried. He didn’t allow me to either go to my friends or my parents’ home. I have to go everywhere with him else I am not allowed to go. I never dare to take murti (idol) of Lord to his home. He like me to wear western clothes to do show off that he is very global and free but his mind is sick.
During fight he told me that he hates Hindus. I asked him why did you marry hindu girl then he said it’s good to convert any hindu girl into Christianity. During fight if I don’t convinced by him than he started hitting himself and even he hit me twice. We were immigrated to Canada so I was waiting for the day to go out of India and get divorce.
Today I’m in Canada and whenever I talk to him for divorce, he fight with me and started hitting him and said me to first kill him and then go. I don’t want to be reason for someone’s suicide so I am still with him. I don’t want kids because by default our kids will be Christian. According to him, its sin in Christianity to take divorce on the other hand he can hit his wife.
Still my parents dont know anything about my bad life. I always pretend them that I am very happy. I dont want to see them sad.
Indian Christians has created their own rules and created their own weird religion which they says Christianity.
My life is so precious. I was very happy in my life but one sick Christian family has devastated it.
I dont know who is admin of the site, but thanks for creating this site and giving awesome replies.
Admin says:
Hello Hinu,
Sorry to hear of your ordeal. Thank you for speaking out! We hope you have someone to help you in this difficult time.
It is not necessarily a religion or interfaith marriage to be blamed here, but youths have to learn to look for warning signs of a religious fanatic.
Your husband is clearly a Love-Proselytizer and a Love-Jihadi. He (and his family) had no interest in a “Hindu†wife. If you want to save your marriage and want them to start loving you dearly, you have to: 1) start believing that Hindus are idol-worshipers and that 2) all Muslims, Jews and Hindus-including Mahatma Gandhi, will go to the hell (on the Judgment day) because they have not accepted that Jesus is the true savior.
If you want to understand mindset of your husband, Molly or McKenna, you have to read “Bible on Hindus?â€
He hit you twice. This is against laws of any country. Tell him not to touch you again otherwise you will report it to the Canadian police who will arrest and deport him to India. Your citing on this web site about hitting you will serve as some proof of his prior behaviour.
At this stage, please do these:
1a) In spite all these, he seems like a good guy and truly loves you. Unfortunately he is under too much influence of his fanatic mother in India. Try to help him to change his fanatic thinking. Lets hope other Christians will comment on this post to give you tips on how to teach him to be a good Christian. If you could remove the satan in his head, it will be a win-win for all. 1b) Tell him that divorce is a reality unless he changes soon. 1c) Even he turns around, don’t plan a child for at least 5 years. 1d) Even if you plan for a child(ren), just for an insurance, make him sign and notarized this document that “We both agreed that we will not baptize our child(ren) till his/her age of 21. At that time, the child(ren) will decide of his/her own religious fate. Further, our contract signed on XXYYZZ date on Rupees 20 stamp is null and void effective today.†After that, in line with the main message of this web site, enjoy your Interfaith Marriage with EQUALITY.
2) If above don’t work out, take a divorce and start a brand new life again.
What ever you decide to do, be honest and tell your parents all facts today. Every one makes mistake. Your parents truly love you and they are waiting to help you. They already know what is going on. They will be happy to have their daughter back. You seem well educated, why will you want to waste your life with a religious fanatic?
Come to think of DIVA, she declined baptism just for marriage and that was a smart move.
You have signed a legal document on a Rupees 20 stamp, probably with your photo and notarized. View a similar document here (India and USA). Legally, you are a Christian. If you take a divorce after having a child, you will not win a child custody case. If you die today without a will, you will be buried as per Christian rites (even after divorce). If you re-marry to a non-Christian your new marriage may be invalid as per Indian laws. If these are not your intentions, you will have to formally convert to Hinduism and legally document it. Best wishes.
Readers, here a former-Hindu named Hinu married to a Christian. Her husband believes that it is sin to be a part of Garba dance, sin to eat prasad and sin for Christians to enter a Hindu temple; however on the other side, even he hates Hindus he dated a Hindu girl, he made her lie to her parents, believes that it’s good to convert any Hindu girl into Christianity, under love-pressure made her change her religion against her wishes, does not allow a Hindu God in their home, made her sit in a church for hours and now physically hurting her. If he has done all these to follow God’s commandments, one has to wonder what kind of God he is following? Is there any one who could understand Hinu’s husband’s (as she put it) “weird religion?â€
To other youths: The BBS (here baptism) is not a hollow ritual devoid of meaning. Don’t mix love and religious conversion. Do not BBS unless your primary intention is to change a religion. The BBS just for marriage will cost you a lot, like Hinu is now suffering. Like what Diva did, the “No BBS†is the best insurance against a Love Jihadi [also read Anu, Intolerant?, FAQ, Rebecca, Vineeta].
To parents: If your son or daughter married in a church or had an Islamic Nikaah, it is likely that he/she may have taken baptism/shahadah religious conversion. Do not underestimate religious conflicts that is going on in their married life, even he/she may keep telling you, like Hinu, that “I am very happy.†To make you happy, he/she may be suffering.
To all wonderful and loving Christians: This Canadian Christian-Christian marriage is in trouble. Without your help, a divorce is eminent. Thought the guy may be a good human being and loves her, he is under too much influence of her fanatic mother who is in India. Please give Hinu tips on how to make her husband a true Christian. Please post this link on your church’s web site and ask others to teach this guy Jesus’ real message of – Love thy Neighbors.
To readers, what would you tell to Hinu? What would you do if your daughter (or sister) is in Hinu’s situation? Hinu baptized for her loved one, was it a true love or a mistake? How would you define Interfaith Marriages with Equality? Express your views here.
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